Shirking responsibility is an innate instinctive reflex in my 'parents',but blaming others is, conversely,equally instinctive in them.

My mother claims to love me, but she has a most imperfect idea of what true loving really means.

To her, 'love' is almost wholly materialistic, and a 'loving' relationship can exist which is totally bereft of emotional empathy.

Maybe her own mother treated her that way, but she can't force me to buy her version and foist it upon others in the same way as she's trying to foist it on me!